I’ve never been a popular guy. I didn’t have much luck with girls either. Nevertheless, when I was 15, I had a crush on a girl. And I proposed her.
She rejected me.
This broke me and I felt like I couldn’t live with myself anymore.
All the rejections I have had so far and all the ways in which I was not living up to my own potential and my own image of who I could be, had become too much to bear. So, I decided to kill myself.
I Went on top of the roof to jump. At the last moment, I told myself that if I’m so desperate that I can even think about not existing anymore. How about I give life another shot and this time use all my anger and desperation towards something positive. How about I prove all the people who rejected me wrong and show them that I am worth something. I started to look for someone who could help me. I had no clue. So, I searched the internet to find help. Soon. I found a website called 2knowmyself. This is a website that has articles on psychology and taught about depression love life success determination. Then I found stevepavlina.com.
Steve did experiments on himself and then published the results. He would go on a vegan diet or go polyamorous and tell the world how his life had been impacted by these decisions. This kind of lifestyle sounded fun. There was a guy who was contributing to the society while he was improving himself and exploring his own potential. That sounded fascinating. I wanted to be like him when I grow up.
Thus, started my self-improvement Journey. I started to. read a lot of books. I read Dale Carnegie to improve my social skills. I read “The magic of thinking big” to ignite my passion and make me believe that dreaming big is not only achievable but it’s also practical.
A turning point in my life was when I read “The Power of Now” that introduced me to spirituality and taught me to disidentify from my ego. Another turning point in my life came when I found out about Dr. Jordan Peterson. He taught me how to take ownership of my life and showed me how life can have meaning. I’ve never stopped reading and trying out new skills or new Lifestyles after that. And this blog is in part me trying to be somewhat like Steve Pavlina where I share my journey, so that maybe I can inspire some of you. Now when someone rejects me, I embrace the pain and thank my luck for giving me a new fuel that will keep the fire inside me burning.
RaihanRiad 