I hated discipline so I looked for better alternatives.

I have always struggled with procrastination. It’s in my genes. I am always submitting things late, often doing them in the last possible moment. Most of my academic studies are done the day before an exam.

A few months earlier I decided to change that. I decided that I’ll do the right things at the right time. But, I couldn’t. I kept slacking off.

So, I went to the all knowing Google and asked it how I could develop discipline. The answers were plenty. The answers were helpful.

This is one Quora reader had to say: “Discipline is always hard. It’s not going to be easier even after 10 years of practice. So mind will always say no. The trick is to stop listening to the mind. Do what you have to do. Pain of discipline is the price of happiness.”

Isn’t it beautiful?

I got so moved by this message that I sprung into action. For 2 days straight I wasted no time in vain. Until I did. In the 3^rd day, my exams were over and I fell back to my usual, lazy self.

After that, I tried to adopt discipline again in my life, multiple times. But I failed. So I started looking for different ideas that could help me with my procrastination habit.

One lazy evening, I was hanging out at a friend’s dorm room. I picked up a book and started reading it. I got hooked. I kept reading the book for about 2 hours before falling asleep.

When I woke up, I realized I had come across a rare gem. This is the book that I needed. I picked up the book again and started thinking about how I would use this in my real life.

And boy o’ boy was my life changed! This book shook my entire life. I realized I didn’t need discipline. At least not the kind that we are familiar with- where you force yourself to do things.

This book helped me realize how my identity was the fuel for my actions. It taught me how I had to organize my environment to facilitate the things I want to do. It taught me how to get rid of my vices.

The book is Atomic Habits.

(You can read my book review about the book here: Atomic Habits is a must read for everyone)

Hard work is overrated, do this instead

Extraordinary achievement is less about talent and more about special opportunity – Malcolm Gladwell.

21^st century civilization has stopped believing in the racist notions of ‘Good genes’ and ‘bad genes’. It used to be a very popular belief not so long ago. White people thought they were better than black people, Nazis deemed themselves better than the Jews and India was divided into ‘The Brahmans’ and ‘The Kshatriyas’, ‘The Vaishyas’ and ‘The Shudras’.

Now, when we see someone prosper, we take a different approach to justify it. We tend to assume that, the successful people are more hardworking. We think maybe they have made sacrifices that we failed to make.

This idea is way better than the former racist and culturist notions of ‘purity’. It has given us a solid blueprint of what it takes to be a better individual than the absurd notions of the past.

However, this modern way of thinking omits one of the biggest contributors to success- Luck.

This is Malcolm Gladwell. He has written several best sellers. In 2008, he published a book called Outliers.

(For those of you who don’t know what an outlier is: it’s the values that are very distant from the averages.)

Bill Gates is an outlier, The Beatles were an outlier, Lionel Messi is an outlier.

Outliers tend to outperform the masses by unfathomable margins. We the common people, can only dream about such results.

Malcolm digs deep into the lives of these types of people and finds out an uncomfortable truth. Luck plays an undeniable factor in their success.

Take Bill Gates for example. His school was very expensive and only wealthy parents could afford to get their children there. A mother’s club in the school, which had enormous funding set up a facility for computer programming, in the early 80’s, that most Universities didn’t have. This portal was extremely costly to access. But Gates having a rich mom, had no problem accessing it. When this facility was shut off, gates hung around University of Washington to practice coding as his house was at a walking distant from the U o W.

How many of us can expect to get such a head start? Malcolm’s book, which I urge you to read, is full of examples like this.

So, stop over idolizing the outliers and start looking for opportunities. What matters most in life is being in the right place in the right moment.

You don’t have to wait for luck to bring you the perfect opportunity. Go out there and look for opportunities. There are a lot of them hiding in plain sight.

(For starters, students can try: youthop.com

I’m sure there are many other online and offline resources out there to find you opportunities. Reach out to the local clubs, go to the toastmaster’s meetings, meet the Olympiad committees or just search for opportunities in your field in google. Even Facebook can help you find the right communities.)

( The title is there to catch eyeballs. I don’t mean to say hard work isn’t an essential factor for success. But it’s far from being the only one.)

Outliers is an outstanding book.

Malcolm Gladwell has a unique way of writing.

He starts all his chapters with one story, only to be interrupted by another one. Half way through the second story you realize that the 2^nd one is actually there to help you understand the first one. It’s a fun journey to go through.

His stories always have themes and counter-themes, and the whole book is there to subvert your expectations and change your mind about how success really works.

But having said that, its not a storybook at all! It’s a non-fiction about how success is not an individual achievement.

Success comes from luck factors, lineage, demographic advantage and even from the month you were born!

No he does not suggest that astrology is at play. Rather he shows how athletes can get advantage from their birth-date because they were born a few months earlier from there peers in the same age class.

He talks about how airlines have solved their ‘culture’ problem, how Bill Joy and Bill Gates got to the top and why KIPP works.

He even talks about how his mother came from Jamaica to lead a successful life in Canada.

This book is sometimes enthralling and enticing. Other times it can get tragic and even terrifying!

But one thing is for sure, this book will change your attitude towards success forever.

It will help you develop gratitude, get rid of envy and create a better platform for you and your family.

This is a book that you definitely want to read.

I can’t recommend ‘The power of now’ enough!

If I had to pick only one book as a lifelong companion, it’d be ‘The power of now’ by ‘Eckhart Tolle’.

Like wine, this book gets better as it ages. I’ve had this for almost seven years now. Throughout all those years, the book has shaped me in the best possible ways.

For, anyone interested in spirituality, ‘The power of now’ is the comprehensive beginner’s guide. For those who are anxious or depressed, this book could give some practical solutions.

Here are some invaluable gems I got out of this book. Enjoy!

1. Time isn’t real:

It isn’t a philosophical statement which is subject to individual judgement. Time literally does not exist. We made it up for convenience. When we think of the past, we do that now. Same goes to the future.

2. Inner Body awareness:

It is said that, Jesus ascended to heaven with his body. He never abandoned it. This saying marks the time period when humans started seeing the body as less of a hindrance to spirituality and more of an ally.

Inner body awareness is a great practice to not lose yourself amidst the chaos of life. Eckhart Tolle dedicated a whole chapter towards the inner body and talks about how your body could be a great vessel for being more present. If you are looking for an app to help you with inner body practices, I suggest Headspace. It has a whole different section about getting in touch with the body, and its really good.

3. Sound as a portal for presence:

Sound and silence, both can be great pointers to help us be more present. Listen to the various types of sound around you. Focus, and you will feel more present. An even better exercise is to listen to the silence. This will calm your mind down.

4. Anger management:

As a young adult, I used to complain a lot and get angry at my parents all the time. But as I kept practicing inner body awareness, I started to catch myself whenever I would start getting angry, I am calmer and more peaceful. If anger doesn’t serve a purpose, we have the choice to let it go. Mindfulness practices enable us to exercise that choice.

5. Your emotions are not ‘You’:

I’ve come to realize that my emotions are just chemical reactions inside my body. They influence my mood and fuel my thoughts. But they are not me. I don’t have to act upon them. I am not sad, I feel sad. I am not lazy; I just have a habit of laziness.

Obviously, I highly recommend this book to anyone. The world would be a better place if more people got some control over their ego. At a time when we are so disconnected with reality that we are ruining our own home planet and waging war against own species, this book is a must read to regain some sanity.